I just started playing Silent Hill 2 and I was very much comprehensive of why it is seen as such a classic the moment I put it in. It is superbly executed especially considering the limitations of the time.
Which actually does bring me to my next point. The game has aged and in some areas not very gracefully (the sometimes laughably atrocious voice acting chief among the offenders) and I often wonder if it makes me uncultured that I find it hard to accept the flaws of the era that spawn a classic. Does it make me a heathen to think that Silent Hill 2 deserves a remake?
Whatever the answer I am quite enjoying myself, scared shitless as I might be.
We certainly do our best to keep things going, so when you do rise to power, please remember not to step on us! :D Also, we're happy to have you to talk to, especially considering the sort of drivel we normally have to deal with DX Also, also, also, also, I say "we" a lot, but it's okay because we are Borg and you will be assimilated.
Well I look forward to being assimilated honestly! I wish we spent more time together because we are awesome people who I haven’t seen much of since the beginning of break (which is a long time). New Years should be fun I think.
PS: You were right I am really very much into Doctor Who.
I recently spent some time with some people whom I do not know very well who were very close friends and I have to say it was a little awkward. They definitely had their own sense of humor and (being the naturally wit-centered person I was) my jokes had a tendency to fall flat. Now it’s not that I begrudge these people their closeness, and it’s entirely possible that their personalities were just not compatible with my own BUT
It occurred to me that anyone on the outside of me and a friend could very likely feel the same way. Gosh life can be complicated sometimes.
I Have Come To the Decision That I Do Not Do Well On My Own
It’s not that I can’t be trusted to make my own decisions, or even really my own fun. The decision itself is something that has been a long time coming and, to be honest, probably was actually made long ago. The issue is not with my ability to take care of myself when completely isolated, the issue is with my inclination to ever be in such a state. Which is never.
I’ve spent most of today at home and it doesn’t feel unlike having a gag in my mouth when I am not around my peers.
This is not some heavy existential issue, seeing as how it was a span of maybe nine hours I have been home today (and that’s generous) just an observation, and perhaps and invitation, in case anyone not already friends with me reads this, to go ahead and chatter endlessly to me. I’d prefer it to silence.
People are really really great. Thank you Tumblr for helping me catalogue and put into words the events in my life. I was once told that I should maintain a blog in order to both work on my writing skills and learn more about myself. Perhaps that person realized how helpful the journey would be for me!
I just went and spent some gift card money at the mall and, intimidated and slightly depressed as I was at the several pretty women I saw today, I had a lot of fun and felt like I pushed a little at the corners of that restrictive wall that IS my comfort zone.
Thanks especially to Iggy and Alex who are only getting better and better to be friends with.
The main character is a hopeless romantic who has finally found the girl of his dreams and has been engaged to her for a little while now. One day a crane drops a ton of bricks on him and he dies, and WHEN he dies he finds himself standing face to face with Death (as in the grim reaper), who tells him that ‘his love was so great that he will be allowed to return to life’ the catch being that in order to do this he has to agree to take some of the burden of ferrying the souls of the dead across to the other side. Protagonist naturally agrees to this, and is brought back to life.
Upon getting back to Earth he realizes that he has been cheated. It’s one maybe two years in the future and his fiance is engaged to someone else now. Rather than ruin her life and possibly send her into therapy for years he decides to leave her alone.
He gets pissed and calls on Death, and Death shows up and informs him that he can’t mess with the threads of fate, Protagonist and Fiance were never meant to get married so he can not allow it to happen. By the end of the conversation we learn that death has been doing this for centuries, he doesn’t actually do his job anymore, he just recruits people like Protagonist, often through trickery, to do it for him.
He ends up living with this girl who made the same deal, who took him in out of the kindness of her heart. And now that he is a corporal being he has to juggle a crappy job (all his college credits belong to someone legally dead), this crazy girl he’s living with, and ferrying the souls of the dead to their destination (and unfortunately being asked deep philosophical questions regularly)
I think that the story would work best in a visual medium, and webcomic is most easily achieved I think. The story should be a comedy for the most part.
Think I should be perfectly up front about my feelings now.
I think that most of the people I know aren’t worth my time. I don’t think my time is worth that much. I find myself physically revolting. I find myself mentally weak. I worry all the time about offending people. I like religion less and less the more I am exposed to it. Everytime I feel someone is worth my time it seems like they should have better things to do than be friends with me. The people I respect and like mean so much more to me than they probably should. I don’t think I’m talented in any particular ways. I have been diagnosed with Bi-Polar disorder by a Doctor once. I have been diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder by a Doctor once. I think is post is whiny and self indulgent, and that it will make everyone respect me less so now I am going to end it abruptly.
There was a huge rant here but then the internet gave out.
More or less the day went badly instead of goodly and now I am bored and upset here on the tumblr at my friends house AGAIN.
It seems like every time I try to do something other than this there is a sullen silence that implies there will be unpleasant consequences (namely bitching) if we try to do anything other than sit here on computers.
I dunno. I think I should leave this train of thought UNexamined. Some doors you do’t want to open.
Just played an awesome game of magic with my awesome deck against my awesome brother and now I am going to back out with my awesome friends and worst case scenario, wander around the woods with them for a while.
I am finding myself in a situation where this is not only my only creative outlet (which I suspect is not all THAT unusual) but also my only recreational outlet. There’s an entire internet out there that I am bored with.
So mostly I sit here and I read the posts that people post and perhaps post a few of my own.
That’s what this is; just another of a hundred posts I make to pass the time.
Aw well thanks! I always wanted to talk more with you but I didn't realize that you wanted to be social XD I am very bad at people when I first met them unless they are batshit insane! As far as lame people goes, yeah. It sucks, but people do get worse sometimes. You're right to vent though! It really seems you are underappreciated and Wayne Brady should go choke a bitch!
I get that a lot! I don’t know how to look like I want people to talk to me! And it’s okay, we talk now and that is plenty good. And I don’t mind it when people turn out to be lame as long as I am not too attatched to them when I figure it out.
Well either way it was very nice of you to allow me to vent regardless! Silly people not appreciating the things I do.
They have just the most enormous collection of music videos. I don’t know what to call these people at all. I tried Semi-Ironic-Hipster-Gangters but that doesn’t seem to be flying with the people in the room with me.
I’ve been feeling recently that I do not do enough socializing when I am with the current group of friends I spend all my time with. It’s not that I feel I need to find a new group of friends or anything NEAR that drastic, I just feel thhat maybe my life would be enhanced some by spending more time with people who actually enjoy talking like I do.
We spend most of the time we hang out doing seperate things on seperate computers and when I do raise conversations I feel like it is not welcome. Perhaps they are just not as good at multitasking or do not have the same predilection for chatter as I do, but sometimes I feel like we are a bit of a poor match as friends.
I love my pals but I just want to spend all my time talking and they…don’t.
P.S. An important thing to remember in relation to this post is that I have a really big nearly pathological issue with being ignored.
I wanted to say thanks for all the kind words. SO THANKS FOR ALL THE KIND WORDS! It really means a lot to have just the proper amount of sympathy, and I think you hit it just SO. But things will get better because I'll be damned if I get all down and out over this! So, thank you. Bunches.
It’s funny you’re all like: I COUNTER THAT GRATITUDE WITH SOME GRATITUDE OF MY OWN!
But it’s no problem at all. I honestly think that you’re gonna be fine! And I wouldn’t bother giving you sympathy if you weren’t an awesome enough person to deserve it!
Well it’s partly been because my life is uneventful. There’s not a lot left now that happens on a daily basis that I haven’t already posted about. But I will tell you that I have been feeling incredibly awful recently.
I’m not sure what the cause is actually, and it’s really starting to worry me. No pretenses, no fancy words or funny turns of phrase, I don’t know why I have been this depressed recently and I don’t know what I am supposed to do about it.
Sometimes I feel like I’ve spent my entire life trying to crawl out of this deep pit of sadness and social anxiety and self-hatred, and every moment I spend clawing at the side and lifting myself higher I am also collapsing the walls and sliding back.
I know I have grown a lot as a person. I know that my life is so much better than it once was. But…I don’t feel like I’ll ever be charasmatic and likable and happy like I have always wanted to be.
I have that sort of desperately cloying depression recently that makes a person do silly things out of desperation to create change.
The thing that is currently rustling my jimmies is my art. I actually am really interested in art, but I am just enormously awful at it. If there is one thing I am really bad at it’s being bad at things.
Right now I am wrestling with frustration as I turn out drawings that look like they were done by a ten year old. Maybe a talented ten year old. Let’s say (for simplicity’s sake) a twelve year old.
Anyway it’s this kind of thing that really makes me want to just give up.
Which doesn’t seem like a lot until you glance over at the time. Truthfully I mostly mentioned my lack of sleep so I have something to point to in response to how weird this post probably is going to be.
I made some bad decisions recently but I’m not letting them effect me. Mostly I’ve been a little mopey about a particular woman whom I am unfortunately never really free of, which leads me to do things that I would not normally do in order to experience feelings other than the particular bad ones I had tired of struggling with.
Even with my weird times going on, and my undoubtedly weird thoughts and actions over the past while, I do feel like maybe my life is trending upwards. I am very lucky to know the people I know. To have walks through the sleeping city, to have He-Man and She-Ra and Ramen and Ham. I’m lucky to have old friends like brothers, and I’m lucky to have new friends that inspire me to be better and yet for some reason like being around me as well.
What I am saying is that maybe, unhappy as I usually am, I am living a life that isn’t all that bad. Maybe I should stop wanting so badly for everyone in the world to love me, or maybe I should try harder. Even as desperate as I am for attention I spend most of my times silent, and as much as I want to be accepted I sure do weird things.
Confused frustrated and loaded with ennui or not; I am a very lucky person in lots of aspects. I can only hope I’ll get luckier, keep my old friends, make old friends of my new friends, and make new friends of appealing strangers.
What I am saying is that I am weak, and I am really happy to have people by my side to help me keep going.
I don’t know if I have come across weird here. Honestly I haven’t slept in almost twenty four hours and my judgement is questionable at best.
I’ll probably make sure not to let myself near Tumblr when I’m all weird anymore.
I should start this by saying that Christmas is (for me) a very sedentary holiday. Or rather Christmas EVE is. And as such I have spent a LOT of time online on sites like Facebook and Tumblr.
What I’ve discovered is that there are a lot of people worried about this time of year. I count myself very lucky. Most of my extended family is dead or doesn’t talk to us so I get to spend time in my warm home in pajamas reading or Facebooking or whatever I want.
UNfortunately I just found out that I am supposed to be going to church Christmas morning. For those of you unaware I am one of the most deeply religiously unaffiliated people you will ever meet. This makes me incredibly uncomfortable.
Either way I am not worrying. i will watch my annual viewing of The Muppet Christmas Carroll and then go to bed, wake up and be given stuff. It’s nice.